The winds of change?

This weekend the hubby and son went off to hunt. Hurricane Ike is bearing down on the Texas coastline and some of my family members are in the affected areas. I have an uncle that has sustained some roof and water damage to his home. Another uncle had some downed trees. Overall, everyone is doing well. And thankfully no one I know was hurt. Now onto me, huh? Most of today it rained a nice soaking Spring-like rain. The about half an hour ago the winds picked up and it actually overturned the basketball goal in the backyard. It made me jump a little, I'll be honest with you. I'm expecting more winds and rain. But luckily our house is made of neither sticks or straw, so I think the big bad Ike will not huff and puff and blow our brick house down. I know none of this has to do with my weight loss, but I thought I'd include it anyways for those bloggy friends of mine who might be concerned for those in the path of this storm.

In order to get my weight under control I need to stop lying to myself. I need to be honest, every day. There are times I think I'm fine with my weight. I'm happy, I have a great family, the love of a wonderful man, and security. Then there's nights I want to cry to sleep over what I've allowed myself to do to my health. I know that the latter is closer to the truth of the matter. I have done this. I picked up the fork and didn't put it down until I was miserable. I DO want to change. I DO want to be happy with my inward AND outward appearance. Today, my daughter and I went to the movies. I made the choice to eat two hot dogs, nachos, half a pickle, and drink a large coke. Afterwords, I felt bad for having done so, but that wasn't enough to stop me.

I'm trying to think of a constant reminder to "keep me in line" with my goals. I'm thinking of trying a bracelet on my right wrist. I'd be making this bracelet myself. I am hoping that since this is the hand I use to hold a fork, and so on, that it will serve as a reminder. I've had great successes and even greater failures in this long journey. And this is what I know it is, a journey. Journeys by definition are not traveled overnight. Over the years I'm sure I've lost 100+ lbs overall, I've gained that too, however. I know I will stumble from time to time, but with every step I vow to learn something and have successes that far outweigh the "bad".

I'm off to make my bracelet.